Last year New Years came and went nothing new nothing special. When I was young I had this internal motto of "live without regret" I explain later why this was a soooo very stupid.
In 2006 I found out that my mom had been diagnosed with 3rd stage cancer. It wasn't long after that I started to balloon from 123 lbs to 140, 150 , 160 within a matter of months. By the end of that year I had grown to a hefty 215 lbs and lost all of my self esteem. Eventually I lost both my parents within a year of each other and spiraled into what I call the "Great Depression"
It is very surreal l to go from a happy, healthy well balanced person to someone who hates the very air they breath. I hated living and going outside because I felt as if people stared and wondered why I couldn't control myself. The truth of it was that I had become a food addict with bad habits plain and simple.
I decided shortley after that if I was going to be fat I was going to love myself no matter what ( big lie) and be the best big person I could be. (another lie) Because I had that live with no regrets moto I just kinda gave up and ended up sabotaging myself. I told myself I did'nt regret gaining weight and I didn't care what the world thought.
Like all addicts I tried to loose occasionally but relapsed quickly. I felt helpless and wondered if I could ever be strong enough to change my life. That January 4th ( I didn't want to do the cliche January 1 thing lol) I just got online and started looking at diets. I finally picked Weight Watchers online and signed up for 3 months. I thought if I could at least lose 10 to 20 pounds I would be happy.
The first week of my diet I lost 5 lbs and that was all the motivation I needed ! Losing that initial 5 kept me motivated to keep going every week and eventually after 11 months of diet and exercise I lost 67 lbs !!!!! I have more work to do but I am really happy with what I have accomplished so far.